What’s better than planning a wedding to the person of your dreams? What about going through all of the excitement of wedding planning when one of your BFFs is planning hers, too? Having a bridesmaid who is in the same boat can be the perfect situation: Someone to vent to, commiserate with, and bounce ideas off of (especially when your fiancé has filled his daily “wedding” quota!). Our experts have rounded up the top dos and don’ts of having an engaged bridesmaid to help make sure your friendship makes it through this crazy time in your lives.

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DO Discuss Dates

While you shouldn’t reschedule your wedding or any of the surrounding events just because your friend has a wedding-related event on the same day, if you’re both in similar stages of the wedding planning process, take a look at a calendar together to do your best not to overlap. If one of your weddings is sooner than the other’s, try to be respectful of what has already been scheduled. After all, you’ll want all your bridesmaids to be there to celebrate with you!

DON'T Talk Budget

Even if you think your weddings will cost approximately the same amount, keep the money talk to a minimum. The last thing you want is for one of you to feel like her wedding won’t be up to par because it’s not as expensive, or to think she’s being extravagant because her budget is higher.

DO Share Vendors

If you’ve found someone you absolutely LOVE and your bestie is still on the hunt, connect her with the photographer/baker/caterer/florist you’ve chosen. Don’t keep a good thing to yourself!

DON'T Stress Her Out

Yes, a little venting is okay, but try not to pile extra stress on your wedding-planning friend (and she should do the same for you). You’ve both got a lot on your plate, so try to keep the wedding talk as positive as possible.

DO Focus on Her

Attending your friend’s bridal shower or bachelorette party? Keep talk of your wedding to a minimum and instead focus on the celebration she’s planning and the relationship she has with her soon-to-be spouse.

DON'T Forget Your Friendship

With two weddings in the works, it can be easy to get caught up in all the to-do lists! Make a point to hang out as friends, not brides-to-be, and to put all the wedding talk on-hold.


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